Don’t Speak

Well, I have been sitting on this one for a while.  I don’t know why, but I could not bring myself to sit down and write this for at least three weeks.  But, I once heard, that the Lord won’t share more with you until you have done what he asks with the words he has already given you.  I can feel that hearing his word is a little me vague, and I desire his presence in my life more than anything.  So, again, I am reminded that obedience comes before sacrifice.  So here it goes.

In Captivating, there is a scene where it talks about three women at a retreat, and the lies that they have believed.  They are asked to go back to their rooms to journal about what the Lord is speaking to them, and it is here that the Lord breaks all three of their lies.  One was don’t ask.  One was don’t offer.  One was don’t speak.

Strangely, I believe all of these myself.

It has taken lots to realize each lie seperately, and I have come to realize that I am valuable.  I can ask.  I have something valuable to give.  I can offer.  So I am left alone, with don’t speak.

For those of you who have known me less than three to four years, I know you don’t believe this.  And looking back in retrospect, is where I find this lie.  Where I see what Jesus has been trying to reveal to me all this time.

When I was in school, even into college, I never raised my hand in class.  I never offered answers.  I was too afraid that I would be considered stupid, or that I might be found out that I was smart, and relied upon to answer all the questions from that point on.  In life, I kept my mouth shut.  I never offered an opinion, never spoke up.  I would have rather been trampled than vulnerable.  Even with my friends, I never spoke.  I was considered shy and quiet.  The truth, is that I was afraid.

Why is this such a shame?

First, the Kingdom of God is voice activated.  From the first time that we proclaim him as Lord of our lives with our mouths, to the very words that we speak over our lives.  Everything that we say and speak outloud, activates the kingdom of God.  All of the power that we have been given, all of the authority, is brought about by speaking the promises in His word.  So if we want to live the powerful and abundant life for which Christ died for us to have, we will speak.

Also, I have always felt that I was blessed with a gift of words.  I feel that those words can be spoken or written.  I think that part of the reason that don’t speak was such a deep rooted lie in my mind, is because that is a lie that would hurt me, and would harm my ministry to others as well.  Because I believe that I can’t speak, that I don’t have anything good to say, I will often put off that blog, (or not write it at all), or hold back a word of encouragement because I am afraid that it could possibly offend.  I will not share what God has done in my life, because I am afraid that I will be thought stupid, unworthy, or that my testimony won’t be scripturally sound.  I will not speak because of my fear.  This hurts those that I am supposed to minister to, and not just me.  It hurts the plan that God has for my life.  It inhibits the plans that my precious Jesus has for me.

So this is me combatting the lie.  This is me speaking.  This is me writing the blog I have put off.  This is me breaking free.

I have a God who deserves to be worshipped with every breath.  I have a God who deserves to be spoken of, who deserves, and longs to be shared.  I have a God who deserves to be praised.  A God who deserves to be honored with a life dedicated to him, and shared with others, through words.  Written words or spoken words.  A God who has given me a gift and wants me to use it. 

Thank you Jesus for this gift.  Thank you for this truth that has set me free.  You are my freedom.  You are the reason that I speak.

Breaking Free,

Princess Brooke